Wall Street

The re-emergence of the Maximum Leader’s college roommate (hereafter referred to as Wall Street) is a joyous event. I anxiously await an update on his post-collegiate activities.

I too, lack understanding about why we fell out of touch. I had presumed that he was in hiding with Saddam and Osama. After all, as the ML can vouch, his anus of destruction certainly qualifies as a Weapon of Mass Destruction. (In a bizarre ritual, the ML was awakened every day of his college career by his roommates’ thunderous anal perorations – the Big Hominid would have been proud of these diarrhetic discursions)

Some of the best days of my life were spent at the end of my sophomore year, hanging out on a porch overlooking metropolitan Farmville, drinking beers and dinking golf balls into the community. The rest of the horsemen were graduating, so I was savoring the last bits of daily companionship before they entered the real working world. Good friends, good conversation, profane jokes, bottomless beer mugs chilled in the freezer by our host, and knowing that I was going home to a hot girlfriend who didn’t mind that I spent most of the day with my buddies. Plus, there was some boot-shooting going on. Don’t ask.

You might have been puzzled by the horseman reference. We jokingly called ourselves (among other things) the five horsemen of the apocalypse – Death, War, Famine, Plague, and Recession. The ML’s roommate, being a business major, was Recession. The Foreign Minister, prior to abandoning Clauswitz’s “other means” for the art of diplomacy, was a WW II re-enactor so earned the moniker of War. I was dubbed Plague for my advocacy of the use of blood agents during the first Gulf War. The host of the hilltop house was Famine, simply because he was Irish. I don’t remember if the ML became Death by default or if there was a reason behind it. Perhaps he could enlighten us.

I wonder what random combination of searches brought Wall Street to the Naked Villainy Blog. I don’t think that there is any searchable link to our real identities on this site. I hope our long lost comrade-in-arms will reveal how he happened to find Mike’s pet web project.