Another Book Sold!
Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader sees that another copy of Harry Potter & the Half Blood Prince has been sold. This time in New York state. It was sold to a nine year old girl.
In other news, Scholastic (Rowling's Publisher) has received a Writ of Stoopidous Rulingus (co-signed by Justices Stevens, Breyer, and Ginsburg) ordering the girl to do the following: 1) not read the book, 2) surrender the book to Scholastic, 3) to not talk about anything she may have read in the book, 4) eat her broccoli, 5) listen to her teachers, 6) exercise three times a day, 7) stop growing, 8) refrain from sexual intercourse until she is at least 18, 9) submit written lists of everthing she buys at any store or from any individual to the Federal District Courts of New York for the next 10 years so that the court can review what economic activity she engages in can be construed as interstate commerce, and 10) buy property in an urban renewal zone so that it can be taken from her at a later date.
In other news, Retiring Justice Sandra Day O'Connor said in a C-Span interview that if this case should make it before the Court at a later time the Justices should create a 10 point test to guide lower courts in future ruling concerning premature book sales.
In other other news, Justices Scalia and Thomas check themselves in to Walter Reed Medical Center because "they feared their eyes would bleed or their brains explode" if they read anything written by their collegues on the Court.
No word on how this might affect the supposed retirement of Chief Justice Rehnquist.
Carry on.
In other news, Scholastic (Rowling's Publisher) has received a Writ of Stoopidous Rulingus (co-signed by Justices Stevens, Breyer, and Ginsburg) ordering the girl to do the following: 1) not read the book, 2) surrender the book to Scholastic, 3) to not talk about anything she may have read in the book, 4) eat her broccoli, 5) listen to her teachers, 6) exercise three times a day, 7) stop growing, 8) refrain from sexual intercourse until she is at least 18, 9) submit written lists of everthing she buys at any store or from any individual to the Federal District Courts of New York for the next 10 years so that the court can review what economic activity she engages in can be construed as interstate commerce, and 10) buy property in an urban renewal zone so that it can be taken from her at a later date.
In other news, Retiring Justice Sandra Day O'Connor said in a C-Span interview that if this case should make it before the Court at a later time the Justices should create a 10 point test to guide lower courts in future ruling concerning premature book sales.
In other other news, Justices Scalia and Thomas check themselves in to Walter Reed Medical Center because "they feared their eyes would bleed or their brains explode" if they read anything written by their collegues on the Court.
No word on how this might affect the supposed retirement of Chief Justice Rehnquist.
Carry on.
posted by The Maximum Leader at 7/13/2005 03:05:00 PM
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