Conspiracy Theories Aplenty.

Hello, fellow minions. 'Tis Sadie, here to exploit this opportunity of guest-blogging for the vacationing Maximum Leader by spreading a little frivolity amidst the otherwise intelligent conversations going on around here. Let us begin, shall we?

Hmmm. It seems that Our Maximum Leader has a thing (or two) in common with the lovely and elegant Miss Jennifer Love Hewitt. In a recent interview Jennifer admits that "she can't stop looking at websites devoted to her breasts." Actually, this fascination seems to border on narcissistic obsession. Check this out:

The star, who has always denied having breast implants, says she often studies the Web pictures to decide which clothes to wear.

She added: "It's fantastic. When I'm in corsets, they're better because they're lifted or separated or whatever."

Earlier this week Jennifer confessed she has difficulty attracting the right men.

The sexy star remains single and has now given up being romantically set-up with men.

Is it just moi, or does it sound like Our Maximum Leader perhaps wrote that interview? Even more disturbing, is it possible that the psuedo-benevolent autocratic despot secretly is Jennifer Love Hewitt, giggling behind her keyboard, just so she can blog about herself on a regular basis? These are burning questions indeed.

I report. You decline to decide.