November 17, 2004

Thoughts on Condi Rice

Since the Humble Smallholder has been fulfilling his minionly duties whilst the other Villains languidly repose, slothlike, in their own filth, delivering no posts ere the last weeks, methinks a promotion would be in order.

Smallholder should be elevated, Rice-like, to a new position of:

status showing sophisticated sycophancy.

Vice-Maximum Leader has a nice ring to it.

I will, of course, accept the post as long as I can bring the Undersecretary of Agriculture with me. (Oops, there I go again violating Biblical Morality...)

Seriously, setting aside alliteration and beautiful women, I share the Maximum Leader's concern about Rice's elevation. While she is certainly qualified and tremendously bright, her elevation will further strengthen the hermetic seal surrounding the Commander-in-chief. We have already seen how the narrow funnel of advice that Bush hears has complicated the postwar (read: insurgent) situation in Iraq. Perhaps he should have had more Powells and Shaliskavilis and Zakiras and Pollaks in his inner circle.

UPDATE FROM YOUR MAXIMUM LEADER: Humm... Vice-Maximum Leader, eh? Your Maximum Leader will mull over Vice-Leader, Deputy-Leader, Sous-Leader, Adjunct-Leader, First Minister, Chancellor, Prime Minister, Constable, Prefect, Tribune and Major-Domo. Of course there is always Catamite to fall back on.

And just to clarify, your Maximum Leader doesn't have any problems with Rice becoming Secretary of State. In fact he's all for it. Aside from the question of Rice's temprament being suited to running the State Department, his concern is more losing the moderate voice of Powell. That voice could be replaced elsewhere in the President's foreign policy team. Perhaps he shouldn't have entitled the post "Reservations on Rice" but instead called it "Wanted: Different Opinion."

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