The Other McCain: Bikini News Roundup

The Other McCain: Bikini News Roundup

Test post from PDA

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader is sitting in a doctors office and pounding away on a tiny qwerty keyboard with his thumbs. This counts as the first post he's ever done from a pda. He would have updated the regular blog if he had been able to remember the login url.

This blogging from a pda is something of a pain in the arse.

Carry on.

He say you Braid Runner

Greetings, loyal readers of the Big Hominid's blog. My own blog is suffering from a faulty module right now, so this space is serving as my only forum for blogging right now. (Well there is my backup blogger site - Got Villainy?. But I'm too lazy to go over there when I am already here....

Ladies and gentlemen, film lovers and geeks... I present you with the best movie review I've read in years...

Blade Runner: The final cut.

Gosh... Me hopes someone gets this for me for Christmas.

Carry on.

Johnny Human Torch

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader shuddered when he read this off the news wire:

MOSCOW (Reuters) - A woman set fire to her ex-husband's penis as he sat naked watching television and drinking vodka, Moscow police said Wednesday.

Asked if the man would make a full recovery, a police spokeswoman said it was "difficult to predict."

The attack climaxed three years of acrimonious enforced co-habitation. The couple divorced three years ago but continued to share a small flat, something common in Russia where property costs are very high.

"It was monstrously painful," the wounded ex-husband told Tvoi Den newspaper. "I was burning like a torch. I don't know what I did to deserve this."

Hummm... Let your Maximum Leader think about this. What could the man have done to deserve this... Not put the toilet seat down? Not squeeze the toothpaste tube from the end? Left dirty dishes in the sink for days on end? Not sharing the remote to the TV? The possibilities are endless...

Also... Was the man awake? The story just says he was naked and drinking in front of the TV. One would have to presume that he a) had fallen asleep and didn't notice his ex-wife preparing to light him aflame or b) been so drunk he didn't notice his ex-wife preparing to light him aflame.

Carry on.

More porcine blogging...

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader and Mrs P's biorythms must be in sync. (Excursus: Does anyone ever talk about biorythms any more? Do you remember those cheesey machines in malls in the late 70's where you put your birthday in to the machine with a quarter and got out that card telling you how your day was going to go? Hummm...) Your Maixmum Leader had a pork post, and Mrs. P had a pork post. Admittedly, hers was much more entertaining and informative...

Your Maximum Leader will now step into some heretical areas (Father M - please get your rosary ready...).

The Smallholder and your Maximum Leader were musing the other day on the telephone about pork. We were discussing the glories of bacon actually. Then it popped out of Smallholder's mouth... "You know," he said. "That bacon isn't perfectly healthy for you must be proof against the concept of a omnibenevolent God. Afterall, if God really loved us he'd let us eat all the bacon we wanted."

Your Maximum Leader, as longtime readers know, is not an adherent to the concept of an omnibenevolent God (at least the omnibenevolence that most people think of). But in the broadest sense your Maximum Leader agreed with the Smallholder. Of course, God must favor Christians because there is no dietary injunction against pork and pork products. On the other hand, the fact that there is bacon at all should count for something. Bacon (and beer, according to Ben Franklin) are proof that God does love us and want us happy.

If only that love were less cholesterol laden...

At some point when your Maximum Leader has some time, he'll have to come up with a porcine theology post...

Carry on.